Saturday, April 25, 2015


James West ordered six Idogs from MaxRobots on December 1st 2020 for the sum of $8500.00 using the new and improved PayPals Universal. He went through the catalog carefully knowing exactly what he wanted if he could find it. On the third page about two thirds down he found exactly what he wanted.

James’s house had been burglarized four times in the last year. The last time his wife had been raped by two intruders and beaten half to death over a three hour period; they have not been identified or caught. Donna wanted to move out of the area and start a new life far from the horrible memories she now suffered from twenty four hours a day.

James loved their house and adored the area they’d picked to live in. He pleaded with Donna to give him a chance to stop the intrusions explaining it had to be people that lived in the area and that the neighborhood in general was a great place to live. He promised to fix the problem and make her feel safe; just give him some time he pleaded.

A large freight truck pulled up to the curb in front of the house and James rushed to meet them before the engine was even turned off. He’d taken the day off from work as he watched via the internet the shipment cross the United States and the shipper promised today’s delivery before noon. They unloaded three large heavy pallets to the curb and James tipped the two men fifty bucks to move the pallets into his garage. He signed the delivery sheet and closed the garage door the second the men cleared the garage with fifty bucks cash in hand.

Three weeks of serious labor every minute he wasn’t at his job; working late into the evenings he completed the final assembly of the sixth Idog late on May 7th. Tomorrow he’d start the programming and plugged all six into the wall multi strip. Full charge was said to take twelve hours initially and six hours after that to keep the batteries up for ten hours of top performance.

“Honey their done” James called his wife from the family room. “I think you’re gonna like our new security system!” James was so excited. He’d researched Idog for hours even calling listed customers on the sites reviews section. He’d been told time and time again that it was the best investment they’d ever bought, plus a couple said the bad guy would never be back, with a little nervous laugh under their breath. They refused to answer any question about how they’d scared off the “bad guy” but he wasn’t deterred.

Donna hadn’t ventured into the garage to see the new Idogs even with James pushing her to see them as he labored to put them together.

He took her by the arm and slowly they walked through the family room and kitchen into the garage. Donna balked as the Idogs came into view. They took up half the garage floor space, each being six foot long and two feet wide; standing four feet tall, all had short black faux hair. All six were standing staring directly forward at the closed garage door, as James and Donna stepped down the two steps into the garage all six heads turned towards the movement. Donna gasped and stopped dead in her tracks. Six Idogs slowly turned towards them closing the distance to five feet moving on silent feet. James gushed “Aren’t they great! I’ve programmed them with special hand signals and speech reconnection for our voices!” Donna was looking up into six dead scary faces.

“Watch this!” James said in his excitement. He raised his right arm and snapped his fist shut. Six Idogs reacted with vicious snapping jaws showing four inch canines and ear splitting growls. Donna fled into the house. Idog #4 moved two feet forward to attack but was stopped by his programming in a jerky half stop. He stood shaking making a metallic jiggling noise as his programming fought the stop command. James made a mental note to check the Q & A section for any possible problem #4 was showing in programming.

He followed Donna into the house leaving the Idogs after giving the instructions to power down. He found her in the bedroom shaking like a leaf.

“What’s wrong honey? They are here to protect you twenty four hours a day” James hugged his wife.

“They scare me.” Donna said in a low voice. Everything scared Donna now after the attack.

“I’ll leave them turned off until you have a chance to get use to them; it was silly of me to have them give the attack warning without you getting use to them first. I just wanted to show you how they will scare off anyone that comes around. They’re guaranteed; I’ve talked to a bunch of people that swear by them!” James felt sick to his stomach seeing Donna being scared night and day. He’d leave the instruction manual and his written voice and motion programming for Donna to read while he was at work tomorrow. He hoped she’d read and with time begin to trust and use the Idogs.

At 6:40pm James pulled into the driveway and hit the garage door opener. He wanted to check the programming on Idog #4 and make sure all were plugged in overnight. As the large door opened his parking spot was open for his car, the Idogs were not in the garage. He pulled into the garage and closed the large overhead door behind his car. Stepping out of the car he called to the closed entry door that he was home. Opening the house door he stepped in and started to call out again for Donna, he was met by two Idogs in full alert stance showing huge teeth and growling; large heads held low bodies ready to spring. “Donna” James called softy, the Idogs recognizing his voice, standing down.

Donna walked into the kitchen followed closely by two Idogs at her heels. James smiled in surprise. “You’re using them!” James exclaimed as a large smile filled his face.

“I read the manual and went to work with them; it’s hard to tell they aren’t real dogs after you get use to them. But don’t let them step on your foot they must weigh two hundred pounds.” Donna smiled.

“One hundred and eighty five actually” James said happily as he’d been in months. “Where are the other two?”

“Just walk into the living room and you’ll see.” Donna said with a smile on her face.

James stepped into the living room and immediately saw why she was smiling. Both Idogs stood in power saving mode on each side of the front door ready to spring into action.

“They can stay in power saving mode for twenty hours while the rest recharge or are working!” “We can have at least two up and running all the time!” Donna was very excited by the new Idogs and had taken over their control in mere hours of James leaving for work. She now had her confidence back and feeling safe.

Three weeks later.

James returned home from a rough day of work; parking the car in the garage he mindlessly stepped into the kitchen through the garage door exhausted; he barely noticed that the door handle had been removed from the garage door. He froze in place as low rumbling growling hit his ears and two large mussels stopped inches from both sides of his head, snapping jaws pushing whiffs of cold air against his temples. He knew not to move; “Donna” James whispered over the growling.

Two more Idogs flew into the kitchen skidding to a halt in front of James ready to pounce leaving large scratches in the linoleum floor.

“Donna” James called just louder than the growling Idogs; “Donna it’s me, please power down the dogs.”

“Oh your home.” Donna said walking into the kitchen, two dogs at her heel both at high alert status and showing teeth. “I reprogrammed the dogs today; I got scared by a delivery man at the front door.” “I raised the attack level to eight and dropped the program restraint levels; I really like their new aggression levels.”

“Donna please!” James whispered.

“Back off girls!” Donna snapped. All six Idogs stopped growling and moved ever so slightly away from James but kept him surrounded at the ready.

“Don’t you think that’s a little scary having them on high alert all the time?” James said getting his breath back.

“You weren’t the one that got raped and beat up where you!” Donna snapped raising her voice. All six dogs jumped in a flash of blinding speed stopping inches from James. The room echoed with growling shaking Idogs as programming barely kept them from tearing him to pieces.

“Donna you’re scaring me, please get them off of me.” James pleaded.

“OH you’re the scared one now are you?” Donna barked. Six Idogs moved forward, the shaking intensifying jaws snapping sending metallic ringing bouncing off the walls. Idog #4 shaking the worst drew blood as snapping jaws caught flesh along James right ear.

“Donna!” James cried. “Please!”

“Dogs level two.” Donna commanded. James dropped into a chair as the six Idogs moved to the outer walls of the kitchen keeping eyes trained on him.

“Normal duties!” Donna snapped and dogs moved swiftly to their programmed duty stations. Two left the kitchen and took up positions at the front door in the living room while two others pushed through the garage door and went to their charging stations.

James watched the dogs leave the kitchen being well aware that two dogs continued to be at Donna’s side watching him intently at a heightened level of aggression.

James stood heading to the sink to wash the blood off his neck from the nip. Both dogs showed teeth at his movement but stood still at Donna’s side. “Don’t you think we should talk about programming before just changing it? I could have been killed! They are nearly out of control!” James was becoming angry with what he’d just been put though. “I come home from working all day and get attacked in my own house by dogs I bought to protect both of us? Can you tell me what the settings are now so I don’t get torn to pieces?”

“I’ve just turned up the aggression levels to protect me better. The delivery man brought the new batteries I ordered to give each dog extended power.” Donna replied showing no remorse.

“The levels are too high I’m turning them down.” James said now clearly angry as he carefully cleaned the blood from the cut on his ear.

“I’ve hacked the system.” Donna shrugged making herself busy at the counter. “I’ve shut you out.”

“You’ve what?” James said. “You’ve hacked the system; you mean you’ve changed their programming at the core level? You blocked my access?”

“I’ve added a seek and attack mode in case someone tries to break in and then runs away. They will now actively pursue and attack as long as their batteries hold out.” Donna explained. “I also raised the attack and aggression model so they are more protective, plus I raised the bite level to two thousand pounds per square inch.”

“You’ve turned them into killing machines! We can’t have them chasing people and attacking! James said alarmed.

Both dogs stepped forward at the new level of James’s voice and showed more teeth. A low growl filling the kitchen space again. Donna didn’t seem to notice.

“You can’t protect me, you’ve proven that! My girls will protect me now! Donna snapped raising her voice in anger.

“I’ve done the best job I can I bought these dogs for you!” James shouted now openly angry.

The garage door flew open ripping the hinges from the studs throwing the door against the kitchen wall and then falling to the floor. Five Idogs ignored their stop programming being over ridden by the loud noise of the falling door. In full attack mode they pulled James to the floor tearing him into small pieces blood covered the walls. One Idog stayed glued to Donna’s side ready to protect her if her litter mates couldn’t.

Donna would make excuses for James missing work until finally the Police were called and Donna set the pack to work protecting her and her home from them.

The long battle with many casualties made the national news two nights in a row. Donna awaits sentencing and MaxRobots Idogs sales have been suspended in the United States pending Congressional Reviews.

From the Ramblings.